Hehaho.
 JieHui , BSS. "I just wanna be carefree". & Friends are my priority.▲ Just words,
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5th Day w/o you. I find myself useless.
Sunday, February 7, 2010. 10:29 AM
So it's just another day i'm w/o him again.He replied, but in a very cold way. I cried again, like how i cried on the day when he ditch me. I'm sorry, i can't give you two blessings for now. Maybe when time flies & just pass, you can see me be able to do it ba. & that's when i know how to love you w/o the need of you loving me. I find myself so useless, why can't i just let go like he does? Why am i crying like a fxuktard yet he's over there so happy with someone else? You told me you're with her, so i was wondering, you got probation & you sneak out of house again , aren't you? Aren't you afraid of going to boyshome or what? But i'm worried for you. I feel myself really damn useless. Worried for someone who will not even care/worried/talk/look at me. You didn't break my heart. My heart is aching, but it's not broken yet. I just feels so tired right now, & i'm so not into anything, no mood for everything. Maybe i should learn from ale, how to be strong. But you'know what, we're in diff situation. So how to be strong when you know you lost it ? How to be strong , when you know you're loving someone who'll never love you back? How to be strong, when you know you're waiting for someone who's not gonna return ? Just like companion's post , "It's sad when people you know, become people you knew". & "When you can walk right past someone like they were never a big part of your life. How you used to be able to talk for hours and how now , you can barely even look at them". I'm pretending to smile, even thou it hurts inside. Cuz other than that, what can i still do ? I finds that you're not the useless one, boy. It's me . The greatest fool of all. The stupidest of all. & applause to myself, cuz it's two days that i never mm. & i craves for one! & thus i just feels so restless now =/ - >ALL (!) THANKZ FOR ALL THOSE ENCOURAGING TAGS PEOPLE. I HOPES I'LL BE FINE & WON'T MAKE YOU PEOPLE WORRIED DE ALRIGHTS, I GONNA STAND STRONG, I KNOW I HAVE TO. & SAME GOES TO MY SOTONG BAOBEI & COMPANION. WE GIRLS, SHOULD STAND STRONG, LIKE BOYS. & SPECIAL THANKZ TO SISTA, MEATBALL, COMPANION, SOTONG BAOBEI, C.LAOGONG, JW, MAGGIEHEAD & S. CUZ THEY KEEP ACCOMPANY ME & THEY MAKES MY DAY. GREAT LOVES!. & I LOVE MY BUNCH OF FRIENDS TOO. But i'm sorry to say again, i know i can't let go yet. But i know i gotta stay strong. Now, he's happy & i'll be happy too. I won't be a nuisance in his life anymore cuz idw him to detest/dislikes/hates me, & i can't give them blessing right now. But all i hopes is that he'll do well in everything. I will still care about everything that he do. I'm not givingup, i'm not stop loving him, i'm not letting go. As long as he's free & happy , i'll just simply smile & be happy too. Wait till they can last for 9months 3days, maybe that day, i can completely let him go & forgets him ba. Cuz, he's the first one to me & i'm also his first one who lasted this long for r/s. If he & she can break our record, i believe they truely love each other then. &! I rmber once he told me, he won't get involve in "jie di lian" , but now.... Hais. Alrights, i've said enuff. Love is not about what you will gets back in return, is whatever you sacrifice for him, do you think it's worth it ?. ;7.48PM. |
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